I always admired those who just go to the world with only a bag and after they become successful, they earned what they always wanted: freedom. Only those who play win. Only those who risk win. I never was brave. I fear of everything. Of the dark, of the solitude, of the downfall. I always scolded myself, because I’m too weak. I can’t live that life what I want, because my fears paralyze me.

But know, when I’m sitting here, in a coffee shop, far away from my home, I realised: hate doesn’t help. You need to love yourself. You need to love your demons too, because they are the part of your life. You need to learn live with them.

Each journey starts with small steps. Maybe, you can’t leave everything behind and start over in a new life right now, but it’s not a problem. You started. You took the first step and this is the most important thing. They weren’t born to be revolutionaries either. They became on the way.

This was our first real common festival with my boyfriend. Although it’s true that we aren’t hardcore festival fans, who can survive everything. I need shower, I need hot food, I need a bed… so, yeah, I’m weak. I can’t dance and drink all night. I’m a silent type, who drinks few beers, but I never get drunk, because I wanna enjoy the concerts. I wanna remember them. And this festival, FEZEN 2017 was memorable!

Not so long time ago, I mentioned in my facebook post that I’m a perfectionist. I try to do everything perfectly, but I’m never satisfied. And this includes this blog as well. I work a lot on my outfit posts and my youtube videos, but at the end I never get what I expected. I ask myself all the time: is this worth doing it?

And after I just look at my instagram and… it’s so lame. My photos aren’t as shiny as theirs. I tried for a long time to look alike them, but now I realised: it doesn’t make sense! I don’t enjoy it and the result isn’t good either. I read lot of fashion blogs and I follow lot of girls on the instagram and their life seems perfect from the outside. They have amazing hair with amazing make up and wear awesome outfits all the time.

I know, they have bad days too, but it’s so hard to believe it…